I guess “The Ruins” is easier to market than “Crap crap triple crap”. 4 American tourists are invited to see some ruins that are off the beaten path. By a German. If your goal is a kick in the strudel, then by all means follow a Greman. I hav’ent trusted the Germans since they followed that vile, hateful dictator. You know who I’m talking about. The evil mr. H. Man that Hasselhoff sucks. These generic, white twenty-somethings end up at a Mayen temple where the locals trap them there. Soon an ancient evil starts stalking them. Yep the ivy. Killer vines. Sure, why not? Nothing taps into peoples primordial fears like a murderous veggie platter. A carrot up the nose, some broccoli in the throat and maybe some cauliflower up the…. well you get the idea. Scary, fun or interesting this aint. A little skin, a lot of gore and a guy snoring down the aisle from me. After this I had an overwelming urge to kick a vegetarian. Save your time and money. Next: not sure. Nothing pulls my trigger right now.
