“Sunshine on my shoulder makes me crash and burn like John Denver”. Was that insensitive? Hey, it’s a hard world in reviewing. Please excuse my language but HOLY TURD FART BUTT. I am so disappointed with this one I just had to vent.
Danny Boyle, who directed this garbage, did the great Trainspotting, Millions and the awesome 28 Days Later, but boy did he swing and miss with this one. The sun’s going out, and the Earth is starting to freeze, so some scientists are sent with a bomb the size of Manhattan to jump-start the sun. The movie joins them 16 months into the trip. The first ship that was sent dissappeared so this is part 2 of the idiot space express.
Now here’s the kicker, the first ship was named “Icarus 1″ and these cheeseheads are in “Icarus 2″. I’m sorry but I’m not going near the sun in anything named Icarus. If the ship’s named “Margarita” or “Palm Tree” or maybe even “Slip n’ Slide” . . . but not Icarus. The crew is the usual stereotypes: The Plant Lady, The Hotshot, The evolved sensitive man and woman, The Stoic Captain, The Loony Psychologist etc. They get a distress signal from Icarus 1, so instead of doing their duty and saving humanity, they side-trip to check out Icarus 1, and of course everything goes wrong. Then, amazingly it turns into a slasher movie. What a load.
Of course the 1 crew member who remmbers they have a job to do at any cost is portrayed as an unevolved troglodyte, while the wimps who endanger the mission are somehow more human. Bah. Even at 108 Min. it was so boring that the green exit sign to my left held my attention better. Awful, schizophrenic mess from some really good film talent. Sigh.
Next: After Sunshine I might review my own suicide
